I can now say I no longer have cancer in me. The 4-5 hour surgery ended up being about 6 1/2 hours.
The day started out rough. I woke up in tears and had a second melt down before we left the house. The third was in the car in the parking garage of the hospital. Jim's dad was at the hospital when we got there. He sat with us when I did the registration and then left when we went off to surgery. From there I changed, then they sent me off for the dye to be injected. That radiologist was great!
I went back to pre-op from there, met with both surgeons, the anesthesiologist, and a million other people. I vaguely remember being wheeled down the hallway, off to surgery.
They took out the breast tissue and with the sentinel lymph node dissection (only taking the first lymph nodes that showed the dye), but those tested positive for cancer. So they took all of the lymph nodes on my right side.
Dr. Calvillo updated Jim on my status who passed it along to everyone else. Then Dr. Chun started the reconstruction. I only remember a little about the recovery room, but they did allow Jim in there for a few. Then he was in my room when I got upstairs. My parents were there as well.
I did NOT sleep at all on Thursday night and was so cranky on Friday. The pain was okay for the most part. LOTS of drugs with the magic button. I am still in a bit of a haze right now. I can't seem to stay awake for me than an hour or so at a time.
Friday I had a bit of a meltdown. Well, more than a bit. I had an absolute panic attack. I called Jim because he can usually talk me out of it. Unfortunately my parents told him I needed rest so he waited to come in (which caused another panic attack).
After sleeping Friday night, I did better yesterday and that's when they sent me home. Last night I slept pretty good on the recliner.
Physically, I'm doing okay. Pain is minimal. I'm doing the exercises they told me to do, Jim is emptying out the drains and I'm taking the antibiotics. Things seems to be okay. I just feel really tight. Almost like a pulled muscle across my entire chest, under my arms. Breathing deeply hurts a bit and where the drains are attached, that hurts with any pressure against them at all.
Emotionally? I think I'm okay. I still feel a bit disconnected. The expanders are in and I got a bit more than I expected, so I'm not flat. I have something there. Just the incision line across each side. But it was still just more STUFF that I had to get through. I don't know. Really hard to explain.
A nurse was checking my bandages and changing them on Friday, just before Jim got there. I told her to do show Jim when he was there, before anyone else came in. She said my boobs looked fabulous. I had no bruising and they looked like regular boobs. I guess that's a really good thing.
The visiting nurse was here today and she said I looked great as well. She said she's seen work all over the place and she wouldn't say they looked great if they didn't. I'm hoping they were both being honest. I just know I don't see bruises. Right now they are smaller than what I saw when I looked down my shirt before, but not too much smaller.
I'm really numb though, more than I expected, all under my right arm. I guess that's from the lymph nodes. They said I'd need to be careful of lymphedema from now on, basically for my life. The lymph nodes are no longer there to clear out fluid or any bacteria if I get a cut or anything on my right arm. Cuts could become infected and anything could cause it to swell up. No blood draws or blood pressure on that arm forever. I was looking into some cute medical alert bracelets earlier that I liked. Good to have for an accident or whatever.
I'm just tired more than anything else. Exhausted. As in I could sleep for a month. I can barely keep my eyes open right now, but I've been awake for about 2 hours now and that's past my limit.
I'll try to keep updates up. My focus is so limited right now with this exhaustion. We'll see what I can do.
No comments:
Post a Comment