Monday, April 1, 2013

Happy April, Happy Spring!

Lately my mind has been swiss cheese.  I never remember what I've done, want I want to do, what I need to do or what I'm actually DOING.  I'm all over the place.  VERY frustrating side effect.  It's called "Chemo Brain". 

But I have been meaning to write.  Again... chemo brain.  No focus & no attention.  I'm all over the place.  Not fun.  Toss in all the other wonderful side effects like scars, no hair, and gaining close to 20 pounds.  So fat, ugly, defective, repulsive and now mentally challenged. 

cancer does wonders for the self esteem.

I may right more on that later, when I have more time.  I am heading to the YMCA this morning for the exercise program I signed up for.  Need to leave here in about a half hour and I'm in my pj's on the sofa right now.  Should get moving in a few if I'm going to make it on time.

While I was surfing online, clearing out email and all of that, I happened to check the "stats" section on my blog.  It breaks down stats by a few categories, including audience, what countries people are reading from. 

Pretty interesting.... in the past 24 hours, I have have more people log on from Russia and Germany than from the United States.  And a LOT more people, five times more people from Russia and Germany combined than from the US.  Weird!  But cool at the same time. 

SO, now time to get ready and head to the Y.  Put on my smile and pretend that I'm doing great and happy and confident and secure in myself. 

OH!  One other thing I wanted to share.  After I emailed a friend today and included how my self esteem is basically shot right now and how I miss feeling good about myself, I went onto Facebook.  One page I "like" now is called The Pink Paper. 

I'm copying their status and photo from a little while ago.  Funny how timing can sometimes be everything. 

The Pink Paper
I AM CONFIDENT is our positive affirmation for today. I am confident in my ability to face any challenge with focus, determination and strength of spirit. I am confident in your ability too!
What's your positive afirmation today?
I AM CONFIDENT is our positive affirmation for today. I am confident in my ability to face any challenge with focus, determination and strength of spirit. I am confident in your ability too! What's your positive afirmation today?
 
 
 
 
 
 
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2 comments:

  1. NancebethMonday, April 01, 2013

    you are beautiful inside and out. and you are a fighter. you've got this, my friend!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JulieTuesday, April 02, 2013

      Thank you! I really really appreciate your support. I know that you "get" it, the feelings of loss and being overwhelmed, the insane emotions and emotional roller coaster ride and how that plus all the other side effets like fatigue and chemo brain can all add up and hit hard once and a while. Good days and not so good days, but trying hard to focus on the good ones. Luckily there are so many more of those! :)

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