Today & How to Help

Yesterday was interesting.  A thirty minute call with my case manager at my health insurance company.  She gave me some great ideas and also let me know I have a wig allowance with my health insurance (and the day before at Dana Farber, they let me know a place which gives free wigs too). 

Then I went to my occupational therapy for my hand (doing better but still struggling with push ups and the plank position), then off for the pre-opp appointment with the fertility specialist.  I'll be getting a call from the pharmacy about sending me drugs for the injections Jim needs to give me to get eggs ready for harvest.  Great terminology, huh? 

In a few weeks at the most, I'll be starting fertility drugs, daily injections, and every few day blood tests and ultrasounds.  FUN!

Right now my struggle is eating right.  77 grams of protein a day?  And not soy protein, whey protein.  Can't eat the 4 boxes of power bars I bought because those are soy based (no soy for my estrogen positive tumor- gives cancer more food).  Greek yogurt is my new breakfast.  Chobani 6 ounces with fruit is 14 grams, so that's not too bad. 

I'm going to have to work on the balance of it.  The HUGE burrito I made the other day?  Yeah, over 30 grams of protein but really?  Half a can of refried beans (3.5 servings per can but for me, 2 servings!), SCOOPS of sour cream, hand fulls of cheese, then some taco sauce....   Um, that's at least 2-3 servings if I went by serving size.  Calories??  HA HA HA!  But, 30 grams of protein!  This will be interesting.

Teaching my bootcamp class today.  Then cleaning the apartment out to hopefully make big progress in moving and getting that place empty.  SO much more to do!!  Trying to not think about it and get overwhelmed with it. 

I HATE moving.  HATE.  I look at everything I need to do and I just freeze up.  I haven't even been to the apartment since I got back from Puerto Rico.  Next weekend will be it.  Getting a UHaul and lugging the big stuff to Jim's house.  Today and tomorrow are basically it for packing up and getting organized and moving the smaller stuff out.  :( 

What else??? 

People keep asking what they can do to help.   Right now, I'm not sure.  I'm trying not to get overwhelmed with the tons of appointments, thinking of fertility issues, what my treatment will be, moving, hand therapy, work.... Just one thing at a time, right?  Once I have surgery, most likely late December or early January, things will change.  But I don't know what that will be yet.  

What helps?

I love cards!  LOVE.  Jim's parents sent me 2 the weekend before Puerto Rico and I loved it.  Just knowing that people are thinking of me, that's huge!  Random flowers here and there are cool too.  Little things like that to put a smile on my face.

For local friends, I know I won't have energy to do the things I was doing before like Kickboxing, running and all that.  But I won't want to be home bound all the time either.  The little nail salon near Marshall's in Weymouth?  Their standard $28 pedi is 45 minutes long, in the massage chair and includes a massage from your knees down!  Little alcoves off to the sides of the hallway with 2 chairs in each, facing 2 on the other side.  Something like that would be a great treat when I'm feeling down. 

Maybe going out to grab some good food, getting all dolled up, and everyone wearing funky crazy (and super cheap!) wigs.  My purple one was only $16.99.  If friends can make that fun, that would be great too! 

Feel free to leave comments here too.  This blog site takes comments.  Just like getting cards, knowing that friends are thinking of me and that people care... that just means so much. 

Like I said, things will change after surgery and when chemo starts.  I don't know what I'll need then.  I know that Jim is doing so much right now and has been an absolute rock for me.  I still couldn't get through all of this without his support.  He'll need breaks though too.  He can't be my dumping ground for all of this.  I'm trying really hard to keep remembering that. 

I want him to go to his gym classes that he loves and spend time "killing people" on his computer games.  He needs his space and time to do what he loves and time away from me and my mess.  He keeps telling me that he's fine and doesn't want support or anything, but this is on him too.  He's part of my life and has this on his plate.  I'm not sure how best to help him at the same time of taking care of me. 

Yesterday I bought a Groupon for yoga classes.  I know that I am going to need to find ways to center myself and stay calm and better ways to relax.  If I can't beat the hell out of a bag in kickboxing, then I need other outlets in my life. 

Guess that's it for right now.